Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Randomize
