hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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