he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
