I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
