Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
