i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
