Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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