I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
