hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
