I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Of course I have a pirate flag
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
