dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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