Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
