Midget sex pt 2 tonight
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Randomize
