So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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