My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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