Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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