How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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