your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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