my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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