So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
