Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
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