At least make sure they are 18
Why
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
