So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
this boner is exhausting
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
