You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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