Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
