At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
