she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
