Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
