the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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