No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
