Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
