You're so nebulous sometimes
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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