Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
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