Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
