A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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