If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
