So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
