You work out of a Hotel?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
