I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
