I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
