i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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