he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
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