I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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