I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon�
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
