This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
