Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
