Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
