just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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