i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I cannot find my penis.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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