Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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